How long has it been? How old could he actually be? He counted the winters he had seen and suddenly felt old, he should be around eleven years old. He shakes his head and his long manes fall carelessly back in position. He didn't feel so old though, his muscles were trained and his body felt strong. He counted back again, it was around eight years ago that he was home for the last time, he missed home. He missed the smell of the horses he had known, he missed the forest that he knew so well. He missed the girl he had been friends with, he missed his past. And yet he knew it would never come back. It would never be the same.

He raises his head, gazes through the many gloomy shadows, his amber colored eyes hot and glowing like hot coals. It was a ghastly weather, he liked it that way. He liked the smell of the rain and the cold numb feeling his body gets when he's been too long in the rain. A sigh leaves his lips and he moves his body, his temperature dropped and he should move a bit to warm his muscles. With a strong powerful pace he evades the three's. The grass caresses his stomach and lashes his legs. He didn't care though, did he even care about anything? There were things he cared about, horses he had loved and lost. There were some who had earned his never ending loyalty, but they didn't care much, nobody really cared.

And maybe that was a good thing, with his job it was best to have no loved ones, to have no one to lose. He knew the shades could manipulate him into anything when they get a grip on one of his relatives, of one of his two sons. He would do anything for his sons, he would die for them. But that wasn't a strange thing to him, he has always given everything to protect the ones who were in need of protection. It was his job, and he was good at it. E'vesdar raises his head, his eyes follow the pastel colors in the sky, the rain that hits the ground. His coat is sodden and his manes stick to his body. A slight grin graced his lips, the charming typical one he had always worn. Looking at the majestic play of rain and thunder he doesn't see the mare near him. When he lowers his gaze he sees her, her coat sodden and sticky like his, a chuckle leaves his lips. 'Not the best weather to go out walking don't you think?' His eyes remain on her face, unabashedly looking at her. She had a beautiful pattern in her coat and her eyes were hot and golden like his. She reminded him of Morrow, and he didn't like that. He didn't wanted to think about the mare with the tiger stripes, he didn't wanted to feel how his heart skips a beat and his temperature rises. He didn't liked that feeling, and he didn't liked her. At least that's what he's been telling him self, mostly because Morrow hated him, and she was very clear of that.

Lost in thoughts he raises his head and tries to forget his memories, his feelings. His eyes catch hers again and he smiles, a little bit forced and not genuine at all. 'You can call me E'vesdar, if you would like' the smile fades and his eyes follow the flow of her mane, and finally stick to the clouds. 'I've never seen you before' he concludes in his deep rough voice.

The rain keeps falling from the sky and drenched in the cold fluid he shivers, it was a cold day although the winter was nearing it's end. He would miss the cold days of the winter, the white snow and the fresh rain, he loved the dark and moody clouds he always felt more in peace when the sky was dark and unpredictable. But soon all this would end and the sunny seasons would start all over, foals would be born and many mares and stallions would fall in love, like each year. None would think about the terrible creatures in the dark, for once they would be happy and enjoy being alive, it always made him smile. Still it wasn't something he would do, he wasn't the one to fall in love and throw himself into it, he rather watches from a distance and wait until the feeling fades, in the end none would stick with him any way. Maybe he was to egocentric for that.

But there were times he longed for some love and felt the loneliness pushing against his skin, grasping towards his throat. He never felt love though, his parents were murdered when he was just some weeks old, he had never felt the warmt or love from a parent, nor from a lover. He had liked Sarafina, maybe he even adored her, but he never felt that crushing desire to never leave her side, to always be with her. Eventually she drove him insane and his inner beast attacked her, he'd never forgive himself, and he'd never again care for someone. He always drove them away in the end anyway.

When her voice abrupts his never ending thoughts he raises his head and chuckles softly, she had a point, he loved this weather while others would call him insane. 'You make a good point there' he says softly, more like a whisper in the wind. He raises his robust head and he finds her smoldering golden eyes. She had gorgeous eyes, they reminded him of Flight, a shiver goes down his spine and a muggy feel spreads through his body. Flight could make him go insane with only looking at him, and it didn't amuse him at all that the stallion now controlled his mind to. Again her soft voice interrupts his thoughts and he smiles, a gentle and small smile. 'It's a pleasure to meet you Sabel, I go by the name E'vesdar' A slightly dark but charming grin graces his lips when he locks his eyes in hers.

She was funny, and charming. She charmed him with such ease that he founds himself smiling once again, something that didn't occur so much. Yet it also didn't occur much that a mare would call him charming, the ones he had met either hated him or just wanted to feel the graces of his high rank. There were some who had earned his trust, not many though. There was the beautiful Lye'et who had always been a part of his life, she's always been his little sister and it wouldn't ever be different, he loved her with all his heart and won't ever give up on her, he knew she'd make it back out of her depression. And then there was Delaney, a mare he knew well and could easily feel what was wrong whenever she visited, yet she didn't knew him at all and he always felt a bit torn with that. And last but not least there was Yrdaice, he'd always love that irritating but trustworthy mare, and that was the big problem she would never have a normal life with him and he had to let her go. That were the three mares that deserved his loyalty, he'd always be there for them no matter what.

It started to frustrate him a bit that he easily drove away on the never ending flood of his thoughts. When she reminds him about her question he shakes his head with an apologetic look. 'I'm so sorry, my thoughts have the tendency to lure me into never ending memories of the past' A sorry smile graces his lips and he find himself once again staring at her. 'Well this charming stallion is just looking for some peace, far away from the storm of duties and the normal life. What about you darling?' Although he had never, ever made a move on a mare the charming smile and nickname came with such ease he was surprised with himself.

He tried to remain his look, and attention to her to make sure she wouldn't feel ignored, he felt bad that he so easily drove off on his thoughts. It was probably one of the main reasons he didn't talk that much with others, they always felt ignored or attacked with his harsh and cold words. She had met him in a better mood today though, his mind was calm and he could easily laugh, it was probably the weather that made him feel comfortable. You wouldn't want to encounter him whenever Rys was around, the black panther he controlled with his mind could do things he'd never forgive himself. A little peace and self reflection was crucial for E'vesdar, it made him peaceful and calm and made sure he didn't had a tantrum.

He was sure she had meant him when she was talking about avoiding trouble, maybe he was trouble, he didn't know. He always tried to do what was right, but he had messed it up more than once. And he wasn't afraid to do horrible thing to get done what was right, some may call him bad but he just fought for justice no matter how hard he had to. His eyes follow the pattern of her coat, hypnotised by her beauty. Her long brown manes curled into each other and sticked to her coat, even though she probably was cold to the bone she looked pretty. A little smile graces her lips and he finds himself smiling once again. Her soft voice catches his attention and he follows her gaze with his eyes, he saw her smile, heard her soft words. He chuckles, a charming smile gracing his lips. 'I'm not someone to get involved with, really darling'

His eyes drift away with the clouds and he longed to stretch his legs and make a good run, there was nothing better than a good run. The wind in your hair and the sun on your skin. He loved to run, he loved to go till his body was about to give up. He loved the numb feeling, the pain that spread through his limbs. He loved the feel of being alive, there was nothing better in the world.

He flicks his ears forward and his eyes find hers again. 'You want to go for a walk? I could use some company' He raises his head, his muscles writhing under his coat. The sun went down and a blueish shine took over the land, in the distance the noise of the sea became clear. 'What do you say about a stroll on the beach, love?' His eyes shimmer in the blue moonlight and he grins.

Maybe it wasn't smart, maybe it was just plain stupid. But he liked her flirtatious smile, and she made him feel as if he cared to someone. She made him feel comfortable, and he liked the feeling. And that was a bad thing, with his role as emperor it wasn't good to have loved ones. he was already scared for the sake of his two sons, he had no need to care about a mare too. And yet it felt good, no mare had ever shown that much interest in his life, or ever looked at him the way she did. It felt as if the loneliness faded away from his veins and his hunger for company was stilled, for at least now. Still he couldn't get rid of the terrible feeling that he betrayed Morrow, although she had made it very clear that she couldn't care less about him. A sigh leaves his lips and the whirlwind of thoughts takes over again.

When the soft charming voice of Sabel reaches his ears he glances at her, a soft smile gracing his lips. Shen did he ever started to like the female population again? Maybe it had been Morrow who had changed his mind, she had shown that not every mare used her beauty to get what she wants. Morrow had made it very clear that she didn't wanted anything from him. Ah well, why should he care? As stated before, he couldn't use a mare in his life anyway.

A slightly charming but less flirtatious grin graces his lips when his eyes finds hers once again. 'I'm not sure about the romantic part, but I could go for a run' His dark eyes glow like smoldering coals when he looks at her, just catching the last bit of that gregarious, charming smile. She tossed her curls slightly, shaking her head ever so gently so that her scent wafted through the small space between them, her scent was deep and fresh like the smell of grass during dawn, or flowers in spring. And then she turned away, as if she had lost interest in him. Maybe it was for the best, though he couldn't get rid of the feeling that he longed for love. He had to admit that she charmed him, and he would have easily give in to her if it wasn't for his conscious to stop him. She deserved better than him, she deserved someone who would actually care about her, someone who would love her, and he wouldn't, that was one thing to be sure of.

Maybe he had been to flirtatious with his phrasing, but he had always called Lye'et his love, he had always charmed Delaney with calling her his treasure. Both mares didn't like him in any way to take it seriously, it had always been normal to talk that way to mares he actually liked. Somehow he always got entangled in the big brother role, and he didn't mind it, the mare that actually made him feel love still had to enter his life, if that would ever happen. 'I prefer something a little...more on the wild side.' She commented coquettishly and a charming grin graces his lips when he watches her take off. Smooth and gracious like a catlike creature she moves her slender body down to the beach. A whiny thunders in the air, although it sounded more like a roar. With strength he moves his long legs under his body and takes off in a canter, his muscles quivering under his coat. Little clouds of white air leave his nostrils and his long manes sway in the wind. 'Well I'm sure I'll be able to be wild' he grins.

The eerie bluish shine of the moon drowned the land in light, something that occurred once a month. He felt bad for not being there when his fellow leaders needed him, but he also couldn’t leave this mare alone as feed for the predators, he actually liked her to much to leave her at all. Yet he had a feeling that teared him apart, he wasn’t where he was needed. His glowing orange eyes follow the prints, gaze upon the dusting sand, and try to define the silhouette of Sabel in the distance. He narrows his eyes and is able to see her slender body moving gracious through the thick and loose sand. With every step along the sand rubs his legs, lashes on his stomach. He liked the feeling of pain, somehow he felt alive when he pushed his body beyond its boundaries.

His hooves thunder on the loose sand, spreading dust like a whirlwind around him. His long manes sway upon the wind and lash against his broad neck. He had the body for long distances. Before he had settled down in Blue Moon Horses he had always travelled far and mostly in a high pace. So he had no hard time with keeping up with her. He flicks his head and stretches his neck, a small smirk gracing his lips, amused, slightly dark and unpredictable. His opaque eyes glow aggressive and belligerent, he had always been a fanatic runner and as a fanatic runner he liked to win. His strong legs move quickly and effortlessly through the loose sand and in a quick pace he finds himself shoulder to shoulder with Sabel. He turns his broad neck and let his eyes slide over her face, her gaze upon the distance and a melancholy ghosted in her eyes. She quickly looked away and E’vesdar decides to let it be nothing more than a memory that would quickly vanish in his never-ending thoughts. Though he couldn’t let go of the feeling that something was bothering her.
The mare flicks her endless tail, the soft satin-like hair caress his skin for a quick, but yet never ending moment. The place where she had touched him felt warm and sultry, he longed for another touch that could excite his nerves, it had been four very long years without a female’s touch.

The sound of crushing waves reaches his ears and he flicks his head, his eyes following the trail of white waves of water that splash against her long legs and embrace her beautiful slender body. A childish, slightly boy-like smile grace his lips when he gazes upon her, even with waves crushing her small and thin body she looked gracious. He races his front legs and pushes off the loose ground, soaring through the cold and frigid air.. and then his body crashes in the waves, his mane and tail sticky against his black body, his eyes widened and searching for Sabel. The water feels cold but rejuvenating, it stings in his legs and a numb feeling is slowly spreading though his veins. He liked being numb.
She offers him a smile, a vain attempt to cover up her sadness moments ago, he smiles back, trying to comfort her somehow. ‘I may be trouble in your eyes, but I’m a pretty good listener as well’ he states, raising his head and lowering his gaze till he finds her gold eyes, like melting honey.

* I am so sorry for stealing your phrases, but they are so pretty <3

She wasn't going to talk about her sorrows, and he didn't want to push any further. A slight grin grace his lips and he raises his shoulders as if saying; whatever you want. His gloomy eyes get caught in her stormy hazelnut eyes, but he is able to let it slip through his fingers as if she never brought up any of her sorrows. 'I do have more important things to worry about-' taken in mind that he didn't tell her about his position, and that he wasn't going to, he had to come up with something if she asked about it '-but I'd rather hear about your idle hopes and fancies' He raises his robust head, the white a-symmetrical marking on his face slightly glowing in the moonlight. 'I'll tell you my hopes, if that will make you feel better' A charming smile graces his lips before he flicks his head and let his eyes get caught by the waves.

'I've had a family a long time ago, in a land very far away. My firstborn was a son O'delden, he was my everything after what I've been through, he was a new blanc canvas, pure and innocent. His life was ready to be drawn and colored, I would be able to correct the faults I made in my childhood. But the force of nature took him away from me before he even turned three. My hope is to see him some day in this life or the next' Although he knew it was not a very fair hope -he wasn't ever going to see O'delden again- he felt relaxed to speak it out. 'In the meantime I have two other sons to care about' A tender smile grace his lips when he thinks about them. 'What about you Sabel?' His eyes find hers and stare for a moment. 'Give me a look inside that pretty head of yours'

The sound of waves crashing on the shore, the wind blowing through his manes, it all vanishes when she starts talking. Her voice softly, with an insecure tone to it, another side to the mare he just met. How longer she's talking how stronger her voice gets, at some point it seems as if she's forgotten about E'vesdar and just tells her story to maybe let go of it. Her story is intriguing and E'vesdar takes in every word she speaks, every little sigh that leaves her thin lips doesn't go unnoticed. After she stops, her last words a bit depressing he raises his head, but stays quiet for a bit. His eyes follow the curves of her slender face, her strong cheekbones and large expressive eyes. He watches as she flashes her lashes and looks up to him. She shrugs and E'vesdar feels bad for her, she probably told him more about herself than she had to anybody in a long time.

'I am very sorry for you' he sighs softly. 'If I know one thing it is how to be the outsider, I've been one my entire life. As soon as my parents were killed I was nothing more than just property of the kingdom. As soon as they know you're different they'll see you as danger' He sighs again, feeling how the rage streams through his vains. He has always been an outsider, and even when he got into the high circles they didn't accept him and threw him out whenever something suspicious happened. He never cared though, but it saddens him that society these days couldn't accept living beings being a bit more odd than normal. 'I think you're a beautiful individual, you made me laugh and I haven't in a very long time. There's no reason to be insecure, absolutely not' He smiles gracefully, hoping to make her feel comfortable.

Her story reminded him much of his own. He didn't had much friends in the past, the only one he had when he was younger betrayed him and left him for dead. He had known some since that day, Lerav was one that he truly beloved, but none really stood with him when he had a hard time. Delaney called herself his friend, but he doubted that, she never asked anything about his past and didn't take any time to really get to know him at all. He liked her presence in the start, she had a lot of problems and gave him something to do and distract him from al his problems. But at the moment he's just to busy to be bothered with all her drama, there was never time for him to open up about his problems and that made him sad. Then there were Flight and Morrow, Flight who was like a storm and teared him apart with just one single glance, that stallion made him feel like melting wax, there was a connection that he could not explain. And although he felt great with Flight, he never felt like he could really get something off his chest. And with Morrow was a whole other situation, he was actually sure she was still plotting his death.

So his conclusion was that he could actually use a friend, maybe it was a good time to let his guard down and show some interest in getting to know others. When his eyes find hers he smiles, her voice is soft and graceful and he's thankful that she feels secure around him. 'I am glad you think so. And you don't have to worry, I've kept standing in the worst part of my life, I think I can handle it' he grins. When she asks about his sons he smiles and let is eyes get caught by the waves. 'My eldest is E'rayhon, he was in the third rank when I last saw him, he's been away for a while and I miss him terribly. My youngest is Roque, he's the Gamma on the second rank, I've raised him by myself but he still has a hard time without his mother' A sigh leaves his lips.

*omg, it's so terrible, so sorry D:

He loved them both dearly, the sudden realisation that hit him when O'delden died made sure that he never ever let one of his offspring get away without knowing him. He wanted to cherish and love them until his dying day, he didn't want them to feel unwanted in any way, he didn't want them to feel like he had when he was younger. Being an orphan never really struck in until he saw the relation between other fathers and sons, he never had a father that he knew and it hit him hard. Since then he has always longed to become the father he never had, and although he started terribly with both of his sons, he was thankful that they both included him in their life. He listens to Sabels soft voice and he smile, tender and caring, his beautiful bubble not yet bursted. 'I've never had a family of my own, and although a loving partner doesn't seem to fit into my life, my sons certainly do, they are the only family I have'

When talking about Roque E'vesdar his gaze lowers and sank into the waves. Roque was the trouble one of the pair, although he loved his so very much, he did regret that one day with Darlica; the mother of Roque. She had been very seducing, and tried to cross boundaries that he didn't wanted to be crossed. She finally toke it to far and E'vesdar lost his mind, Roque wasn't made out of love, yet he wasn't a child of hate. E'vesdar could've really cared for Darlica if she didn't dump her foal with him, that day he lost all his respect for that mare. 'His mother never wanted a foal, neither was I longing to start a family. She played a game, like so many mares around here. She was terrified when she got pregnant and dumped Roque with me as soon as he was born. I've never seen her again, but as I've heard she's having an affaire with a shade. Well whatever suits her' He flicks his head, his orange eyes bursting with a sudden rage.

He hears her soft voice and turns his head to her. He felt it before she actually said it, she could've been a mother. 'I am terribly sorry for you' his voice soft and hopefully comforting. Her pause gives him the possibility to softe brush his nose against her shoulder. 'You would've made a great mum' He grins, cheeky and a bit brutal.

Maybe Roque was better off this way, but it didn't make it al better for him. His son had rejected his mother and written her out of his life, he had grown up without a mother figure. That was probably also the reason Roque was flirtatious, but never really wanted to settle down with a mare. A sigh leaves his lips, although he loved his sons they both had an own life and E'vesdar didn't have to care for them anymore, his family was just him at the moment and sometimes that made him sad, or even lonely. Being alone with his thoughts most of the time led to uncontrollable anger.

Listening to her soft voice he once again realices how much she has been through herself, never being accepted and losing your only friend. E'vesdar never truly believed in friends again after that dreadful night, but he sure could be one for her, he was a good listener. 'Well I'm sure they won't kill me' He chuckles when he looks at her. 'If you would ever consider me a friend of course'